i tried to do you right, why'd you have to go and turn to ice?

there is nothing like the first italian ice of the season [chocolate mousse chip!] , and a good great new read:

BELONG TO ME by Marisa de los Santos

"no, see, that's just it. it's not The Origin of the Species. not 'the species.' just species. all species. it's not about us. we think we're the center of everything because we're smarter than other animals, but that's not even fair because we invented the whole idea of 'smart' and decided that smart means the thing that we are. when you think about it, whales are smarter than we are when it comes to surviving in the deep ocean, right?"
-character: dev tremain, 13 year old boy, page 38

a lot of people will call me stupid, or silly, or misinformed, because i truly and wholeheartedly, completely agree with this. i don't believe humans are the best, the most evolved, the smartest, the most important. who could know such a thing but the one who created us? we have no way of gaging*** which species is best..i do believe that humans are very intelligent, yet somewhere along the way we have lost sight of what's important. like SURVIVAL. and we are ruining our own survival by not caring for the earth. therefore, we will eventually cease to survive because of our own doing. so..... how can we say survival of the fittest/humans are the fittest? we certainly are not if we cant even realize that we need to protect the earth, protect the animals, and protect ourselves. i think that even someone who hates everyone and everything, but loves him or herself, would find it logical to protect the earth if only so that he or she could survive. think about it.

***for the person who commented rather rudely on my formspring, and then proceeded to dis my vocabulary/grammar and the like (all the while not being so hot at it his or herself), GAGING means measuring or determining. so in this case, we have no way of DETERMINING which species is best. it's not a misspelling of "gagging" or a made-up word. next time you decided to go around attacking people, it's a good idea to make sure your own shit doesn't stink. and to me, if your vocabulary is that mediocre, the your shit definitely stinks. have a great day, "anonymous." by the way, i know who you are :) and who you're employing to help you:) get off of my blog and go live the life someone your age is supposed to be living. and by that i mean your real age, the age on your license, not the age you've apparently decided you'd rather be (4).

sunny and 50 degrees. i like it!

"How are you?" and "How dare you?" are the same sentence with one added letter. just noticed that. i've been noticing a lot of things like that lately. meanings can be changed with the addition of a letter, or switching of letters (begin/being).

How am i?
I'm fine.
How dare i?
I dare daringly. i dare to fly. i dare to stay true to myself.
i dare to like what i like and be open to new things.
i dare to say that i'm confused.
i dare to wonder what the future holds.

how (d)are you?

addicted to the internet

if my computer died today, i would get so much done. i'd finish my 4th book of the week (Hate List by Jennifer Brown), i'd get another 10 pages added to my short story-turned-novella, The Dream Catcher, i'd watch Amelie and pay attention because its in french, i would study some french, i would do some homework thats not due yet so that i was ahead, i'd go outside and take some pretty pictures... i could go on forever. but right now i'm watching the children, so some of this can't be done anyway.

this summer i'm going to pick one week, and for that whole week, i'm not going to go on the computer OR watch tv when i'm alone and bored. not at all :)
i'm also going to drink even more water than i already do, and eat only fruit as snacks (but i will NOT deprive myself of dark chocolate!!)
i hope i find a job finally.
and i hope to go to the beach lots. reading on the beach is the best.

MAYBE i'll have a party, and MAYBE i'll have a reckless night with my girlfriends <3

what are YOU going to do this summer?

celebration.

ladies and gentleman, boys and girls of all ages.
today, a miracle occurred. a real, sparking, wonderful miracle.


here is the step by step of the miracle.


1- erin decides that her broken phone MUST be replaced.
without notifying mom.
or dad.
or anyone.
2-erin calls john and annoys him a bit.
3- erin starts to activate new phone, gets nervous, and never completes process.
4- erin then calls her cell number to see which phone rings. it goes to voice mail. erin starts to panic.
5- erin calls her cell number again. old phone starts ringing. erin ignores call and for some reason opens her phone, even though the inside screen has been broken since early september..
6- inside screen is no longer broken. erin now believes in miracles more than ever.


life is love. <3

currently reading:

Revolting Youth by C.D.Payne.
Nylon Magazine February 2010
                           March 2010

the nylons will get cut into collages.
fashion.
music.
don't tell me who to be, but give me the tools to find out on my own
who i am and who i want to be.

As for Revolting Youth, i like it so far.i'm on page 53 out of 276... it's the sequel to Youth in Revolt, a book i read over the summer, and basis for the same-titled movie starring Michael Cera (which i have yet to see :( ) From my point of view, the first book (3 in 1) was better, but since i'm only so much into it, i can't really judge. all i can say is Nick Twisp is still dressed as a girl. and surprisingly, i still see the boy i made up in my head, and not Michael Cera. the cover of the version of the book the library gave me is ugly. it makes the book not look so great like the new cover does. i wish that all books had beautiful covers... i know not to judge books based on looks, but aesthetics don't hurt. although i can't recommend this book quite yet, i definitely recommend its predecessor!!

tonight i had lunch with my dad. it was awesome to have one on one time with him and talk adult to adult, and father to child at the same time. i love my dad, he's always been there for me and i am extremely fortunate to have a wonderful relationship with him. i'm extremely sad that he doesn't live with us anymore, but i've never doubted his love and devotion for us kids for even a moment. i wish everyone could say the same about their own fathers.

to those who are reaching out to me, please don't hesitate to send me a text or message, i'm always here to talk. anytime.

LIGHTS

LIGHTS is coming to nassau community college to do a free concert for the students. i am beyond excited, and i might have already mentioned this.... but it deserves another mention :) I am in love with this girl. "Ice" has been stuck in my head all day.. I hope she plays "Ice," "February Air," "The Listening," and "Pretend." i hope she plays every song she has...

**i do not own this picture**

"I'm looking at you looking at me, what can I do but say sorry
It's a little late but you know I just want you to be happy.
What I got to say to make you let me get away with it this time.
I know you're upset and that you're happy just to sit and hate me,
But i'll make a bet that you'll be better to forget about me,
Even better yet I'll let a little light melt the ice, ice baby!" 

just a day, just an ordinary day...

last night i dreamt about dream catchers. i've been writing about them so much, it was inevitable. no nightmares have plagued me this past week, knock in wood. i find it ironic that as soon as i decide to put these nightmares to use, they vanish. but i'm sure they won't be gone for long. my intuition tells me as much.

i dream about animals. i dream in vivid pictures, all in color. i dream about spirits coming to visit me. i dream about lions on subways and being lost in parking lots. i dream about being in love, kissing, holding someone's hand, being myself. i wish i had a record of every dream i've ever had.

today i got my sticker from nassau so i can see LIGHTS in concert, i went to poetry class, and then my teacher and adam ruined everything. our teacher is absolutely brain dead. she is a poetry teacher who doesnt understand abstract. adam is just... unbelievable. poor alessia, one of maybe 3 [above average] intelligent people in the class, writes wonderful poetry. and then our teacher, adam, and the class, shit on it one by one. they do it to me too, but not as badly. the whole point of our workshop is to ENCOURAGE people and criticize CONSTRUCTIVELY. not to tear people down. so fuck you, poetry teacher, and fuck you adam.

other than that, it was a nice day. semi-okay pizza, nice music, sun, and a long drive around town. but now i have a headache. time to lay down and maybe write some poetry. bon soir!!