sometimes i wish i could box up certain thoughts and feelings and put them away for a little while so i can stop obsessing over who was right, or wrong, or why i can't get over something. when the anger fades away, and then the sadness follows suit, i can take the box out and reflect, and see the truth for what it really is.
you hurt my feelings. you damaged me just a little. and i let you and i shouldn't have. but you shouldn't have done something you COULD help. and now i am left feeling like i lost a friend before i really made one. i have such horrible luck with friends. i have very few and that is okay with me. what is nOT okay with me is when i try so hard to make new friends and it doesn't work. i don't drink, or they don't do anything i'm interested in. i've went outside of my comfort zone many times to try to find something that works. often i fail and am left more fragile than before.
you know what has been going on in my life. you know there is more than i allude to, and, in your own words, you chose to "antagonize" me. way more than necessary. silly me thinking that because i have one brand new great friendship, i could have some more.
if you decide you want to be a friend, let me know.
0 comments:
Post a Comment